Long, long time ago, okay not so long ago, there was a peasant girl called Nerdorina. I call her a peasant because she says she is one, well she calls herself a working class/ proletariat person. That is far from the truth she is a proletariat with a lot of bourgeois habits and she openly admits to her being so... but Nerdorina the peasant has been and still is a princess to many people, but that is a different story and will not be mentioned here, not because i respect her privacy but its too messy to get into.
Coming back to our story, Nerdorina and Princess Sarcastica(irony that she is nobody's princess and the peasant girl is..) went to a modern day tavern - where the rivers of liquid gold flow freely and fearlessly, distorting the minds of many just like the smoke that hangs around like fog in the morning in winter. Why did two pretty damsels go to the tavern all alone? Well they had many motives - Nerdorina had to get permission from the owner, to shoot a film for her research project. So it is strictly business she said - then one could see the unmistakable spark in her four eyes two of which were red and black. Nerdorina had her reasons - a reason who plays track after track, every night at the tavern. The reason also had a trishul piercing, ( Sarcastica : am sure he is in league with some hindutva faction! Nerdorina : hmpf!) and hence her reason was christened TP- wala( TP = trishul piercing).
Sarcastica was worried that people might think her and nerdorina were a lesbian couple because they had frequented the bar before and it was just the two of them.Nerdorina didn't care she had the hots for TP- wala. Sarcastica was really bored and hadn't had the drink, that many called her birth right, for ages now. So she just went along for the fun or as she said let the good times roll!She could always make fun of Nerdorina (yup! Sarcastica is the mean one) and beer is not alcoholic (hence her excuse) so a few glasses wouldn't hurt!Six thirty, on a very rainy day and they are glad to be underground in a near empty PUB- they get a good table but princess Sarcastica doesn't want to sit anywhere near the MAN UTD banner. Nerdorina sits near it anyway and princess grumbles- throws a near tantrum but shut ups when she is promised beer.
The drinks snacks are ordered and Nerdorina wonders if she should go talk to the owner, she decides to wait a while- I'll go after a smoke and a few sips of beer she says.With a little alcohol in their systems they start with their insane, seemingly pointless discussions that could be marked as pseudo- intellectual and dumb at the same time(to be noted that its not the alcohol, that makes them talk like they do- its the same when they are sober). Nerdorina having had a few sips of beer - guided by her urge to smoke rummages through her bag for smokes and matches. She finds her smokes easily enough - sarcastica would be worried if she didn't find them ( nerdorina gets real nasty and cranky without her smokes and sarcastica can't handle her then). Nerdorina's face morphs and she continues frantically digging up the contents of her bag - and out on the table is a RUSHDIE novel! "Where the fuck is my lighter?" she screams in sheer desperation. A waiter jumps to the rescue of our damsel in distress- he offers her a light and all is well or so it seemed. Sarcastica saw the RUSHDIE novel and was dying to start with her snide, cheeky remarks and was shutting up because she didn't want to piss off Nerdorina when she was not functioning like a chimney spewing out smoke.
Sarcastica : novel huh?
nerdorina : yeah thought I'd get to read a bit if i got bored.
S: wow! you can actually read novels in pub, they are so well lit up and not too different from libraries! Right on sister! The loud music and noise - excellent ambience to read for sure!
n: I knew I’d get bored with YOU!!!
S: NERD! Hmpf!
(Silence, well if u don't count the classic rock in the background and over thirty people yelling all around them, both of them gulp down beer to drown out the relative silence at their table)
Right now its very essential to mention that Nerdorina and Sarcastica share a love- hate relationship- they make take each others cases but at the end of the day things work out so them. So Sarcastica starts babling along again (yeah she just can't shut up- she can go on and on and on)"hey guess what am checking out your TP - wala" she said mockingly, but it was HIM that they were talking about to nerdorina cheered up and said tell me more... so sarcastic obliged n described his every move on the bar stool and at the end when he went out of sight she remarked " hmm, not bad, really not bad, he is kinda cute". Nerdorina dreamily lost in some parallel universe says “oh! Yes he is.. " Sarcastica shook her out of reverie by saying " You know a guy like that wont be on the market for long, am sure he has a girlfriend or is gay or something".
More angry looks are thrown around there is another spell of silence.Some 20-20 world cup match was going on and hence started their next discussion
Sarcatica : is cricket bourgeois or proletariat?
Nerdorina : that will depend on many things like say the country... interesting question...
S : (trying to look at her reflection in the beer) do you suppose its the same with beer? i mean is it bourgeois? Everything changes when we talk about India....And a long insane conversation followed where the world was divided into bourgeois and proletariat etc.)
The end!
The end!
